A week ago I celebrated my birthday. 1 month after the real day, but based on a very conscious decision. We were away from Estonia with our family in January and, thus, were not close to our friends.
At first, it seemed logical not to have a party this time due to this practical set of circumstances. A moment later, however, I was confident that creating and sharing emotions together with my friends is something I want.
I chose a date in February and looked for a solution that would enable me to create something special together with all the people involved. This year I have worded one of my focuses as the desire to find something that ignites creativity, brings me out of the comfort zone, creates new ideas and emotions in each calendar month.
Deriving from that focus I came to the idea for my birthday gathering. So, in the first stage, we had a guided drawing session with a fantastic burlesque model, and, thereafter continued at the traditional long table. The drawing experience was the main topic of the first conversations and of the desire to share one’s creations with others. The long table brought along the “you remember-when” and “isn’t it-so-today” tales.
But this evening is actually not what I want to describe to you in detail.
The thought that I’ve been following this week in the best sense is: Who are these mystical “my people”?
One of the guests, with whom we do not communicate too often (enough), asked me: “Annika, why did you invite us this time? We haven’t celebrated anything together for a long time …” My answer was, that we met last fall at a common friend ‘s birthday and for me it was the same emotional and personal and natural coexistence as the history of all our communication that began more than 20 years ago.
The “my people ” benchmark is not the density of meetings or number of occurrences. Daily hustle is not a stronger prerequisite than a couple of memorable conversations in a cafe. This “my people” feeling is rather something mysterious. For me, it’s recognizing that it feels comfortable, beautiful, light and inspiring to be together and talk, know, experience and share the same time and space. NB! It has nothing to do with sharing the same opinion or agreeing on everything!
I have noticed that there are people in my life who, at some point in time, become very close, because there are common themes, but often also practical goals and activities. Then this relationship naturally fades, because this common part diminishes and disappears. Time passes – sometimes years – and an occasional meeting, news stream, my own new idea on a subject, brings us together. And you know what! – still the same feeling: “my person”.
A related topic with which my thoughts have been busy is whether it’s important to be surrounded by these “my people” in the work life? Are we happier then? More inspired? Wanting to do even more and even better? More motivated?
Okay, we don’t have to go to such extremes, but is it crucial to have at least 1 person among your co-workers and / or partners with whom it is really good to think and do things together? – My answer: “A big fat yes.” I am personally at my best and ready to conquer the mountain peaks, new areas and the hearts of people if I can share it with at least 1 “my person”.
So. What are the options?
* In addition to my private life I can create a work life as a place for like-minded people, partners, “my people”.
* I shall only join teams where I know at least one such person exists.
* I know that these people are there in my private life and I realize that work is not the place where the existence of fellowship is a prerequisite.
* I invite my birthday guests and suggest: “Let’s do something together, my people!”
I have no ready solutions neither a 100% tested recipe for you.
What I do have is a message to you: Find and take care of “my people” and think of them first when you dream about new challenges. It’s highly possible that somebody is in the same place at the same time, and this is a fantastic precondition and potential corner stone for the creation of great joys!